Its been almost two years since I've stopped training as part of the TJC climbing club. Despite that, i can still vividly recall a typical day of training in my alma mater; one thats filled with the vicissitudes of life.
If i recall correctly, i joined TJCCC as i was intrigued by the tiles and orientation of both the climbing/bouldering wall and as part of a personal quest for overall fitness; which was exuded by the grace of professional climbers.
At that time, i admit that i was not that physically well-built, nor did i possess enviable strength to begin with. As a result, my performance from the start wasn't fantastic but my predisposition to think optimistically succeeded in overcoming any negative emotions. That, coupled with the initial enthuse, continued to make me believe that i would improve as time went on which i really wanted to prove.
The culture at that point was a competitive one, where the better equipped climbers would be given more attention to ensure that they would live up to TJCCC's expectations whereas the average climber would be ignored. It seemed to be like a case of 'Perform or be shunned'. At certain stages, i was propelled to believe that the unfriendliness of the coach towards myself was because of my inadequacy. This was a mental state which i constantly grappled with.
Nevertheless, i was persistent and continued to show a positive outlook as it was more likely to spur improvement within myself. Over time, i poured in effort and improvement showed, though somewhat negligible compared to the standards of others.
I managed to make a physical breakthrough and trained to hone my techniques and composure with fervor. But more importantly, the greatest takeaway from my 1 and half year stint at TJCCC is the bonds of friendship forged with the other members. I value their company and friendship, even if i revealed close to nothing about myself to them.
I do not expect anyone else to understand my feelings at those plateaus. This is merely some personal recollections.
Friday, June 12, 2009
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Everchanging perceptions
Its been awhile since tumultuous thoughts occupied every fiber of my being; with the newly ingrained acceptance.
I have to say that i at least, realized that each plays his/her own role in society and that each role is just as of paramount importance as the next. Notwithstanding disputes, people may have some disagreements with their own roles and with that of others.
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Whilst i was still conducting the field defense course as an auxiliary instructor, i had the notion that once the course was over, it was over. This stemmed from the fact that the trainees would pass out eventually and become the respective shift men. I was indeed wrong, proven that i could still be a mentor to the guys. The relationship between trainee and instructor is still ongoing, albeit on a new level. It was heartening to be proved otherwise.
I have to say that i at least, realized that each plays his/her own role in society and that each role is just as of paramount importance as the next. Notwithstanding disputes, people may have some disagreements with their own roles and with that of others.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Whilst i was still conducting the field defense course as an auxiliary instructor, i had the notion that once the course was over, it was over. This stemmed from the fact that the trainees would pass out eventually and become the respective shift men. I was indeed wrong, proven that i could still be a mentor to the guys. The relationship between trainee and instructor is still ongoing, albeit on a new level. It was heartening to be proved otherwise.
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